Of Acts and Plays

July 19, 2007 at 8:48 am | Posted in bong, life | 8 Comments

I think Aruna’s celebrity status reached tipping point today, roaring into an exponential height!

Well, she’s always been the play write on the block so that doesn’t surprise me too much. Just that looking at a friend from school plant her flags in the peaks fills me with pride. And a ride again down nostalgia, through my alma mater.

Having a considerably good flow of language and a towering confidence level often spilling to aristocratic arrogance, an over dramatized lifestyle and all the ingredients in, my peers had almost assumed Id go the media way. And thinking back into those lines, I realize why I am truly happy for Aruna, and why Im glad its her and not me there today!

True, I am not the stage fearing types. Truer still, my excuses and innocent ‘it wasn’t me… it was the one-eyed man’ stories definitely bordered extreme acting acumen. But laughing at a joke you don’t get, cracked by a person you don’t like is one thing. Acting is quite another…

The first time I got into ‘theater’, as one might call it, was in third grade. I was the villain who stole the protagonist’s gold and replaced it with olives. OLIVES! I mean, yeah, the hero guy was pretty stupid to leave his wealth with me. But OLIVES?

The next episode was when I gave Zeus and his sides kick some bread and wine. And he blesses me and my wife to become trees! I mean seriously, I give the man food, and yeah, it wasn’t expensive French wine. But what fun can being a tree be? Moreover, if I remember right, my wife and I become different species- she a lime and I an Oak! That means my kids are going to be yellow, sour and perennially hard! Thanks a lot Zeus!

Grade 5 was the year of forcible conversions. I was signed up after extensive auditions to play a very significant part in an adaptation play of ‘Puss in Boots’. Till today I have a million admirers who will always fondly remember me as the guy in row seven column three, dressed in stupid farmer clothes with no dialogs to say and pretty much nothing to do!

Equated to a standstill prop, I was a little apprehensive to sign up the next year. But then, I had earned the respect of being a regular, and my name was on the sheet even before I signed in. Grade 6 saw me in Batman. Ok- I wasn’t Batman. And I declined the offer to be dressed in red underwear and yellow belts, so Robin was out of the picture too. The director just took one look at me, and it was as obvious as it can be. I was again cast into the role I play best- the villain. Being Eggheads’ evil henchman (row 4) just bordered on fun, since at least now I could beat the hero up (Standard batman procedure to be stupid and get into trouble… Standard batman villain procedure to not kill him with a gunshot).

By this time, I realized that in the negative probability that I have a chance to take the spotlight, the power would unceremoniously be turned off. Grade 7 was being quiet and just talking- no acting.

Of the entire acting career, grade 8 saw the best of me. I was the rabbit, my face well hidden behind a paper rabbit face in the “Animals-Minority tribunal” play we staged. And guess the only animal which did not have a pickle to fix? The Rabbit! And then all animals decide to be good to humans, sing a really retarded poem and dance to Heal the World… I mean seriously, you know its time to stop when you are a rabbit dancing to Michael Jackson!

That final piece of Theater has kind of had me emotionally traumatized ever since. So much that I have completely refrained from the drama circles… Speaking comes naturally. But I realize my face is made of some plastic polymer and I get an instant hate towards all mankind just when someone says SMILE (especially the passport size photo on my driving license).

The last episode from school was in my final year at grade 12. Being the school leader, I was expected to start the show with a flowery speech. No problem. A minor accident the day before had my glasses broken and one of my eyes was swollen enough to dwarf cyclops. I start with an eloquent welcome. Halfway through the address, the curtains raise and I enter the stage admist drum rolls and beats. A true moment of glory. And the spotlight that evaded me all those years got me. Right on the eye it shouldn’t. Squinting through in the sudden glare and searing pain, I spoke a few words ina little deviation from the script. A couple of words which would have been censored in a not-so-live environment…
I have shunned from those menacing devices- spot lights, flash lights, tube lights etc ever since… and that pretty much sums my apprehensions towards keywords such as theatre (not gone to Satyam in ages), plays (hate cricket), act (never liked pop corn) and the likes…

Ah, well, like I started out, Congrats Aruna, on becoming an international celebrity!


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  1. interesting

  2. Quite an intriguing acting record you’ve got there. I wouldnt be surprised if they were all PSBB Anniversary shows.

  3. @peppersalt: it probably took you 5 minutes to browse through the blog and another 2 for the comments page to load… and you thought to conjure ONE WORD?!!

    @mayth: surprise surprise surprise!!!!
    not all… just the puss in boots and the batman part… others were for the even more demented GA… i keep telling ppl ive had a troubled childhood!!

  4. edhellam right dhan ,
    but in case you’ve missed the fine print, buddy boy, you’re tagged 🙂

  5. lol…. GA’s were wacky.. I was once Jayalalitha in 10th grade..and this fella called Arjun had ta carry a pic of MGR and followme around..
    oh yeah, GA’s were good fun 😀

  6. @santhosh- danku danku danku

    @mayth- i was markiv most of my life and acting HUMAN has been quite the effort!

  7. Looks like U had an amazing actin carrier. y don’t u try acting along side “jeyam” Hero in his next movie – Pongal.

  8. naa… if its a ravi i’d have to act with it would have to be 7G ravi… of course since he cant act for peanuts id probably grab the academy awards… but the shame and disgrace will paint me burnt forever…
    nope. id stick to writing!

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